Posted by: Meagan | September 7, 2011

Some Pillow Time

So whenever my husband is out of town I sleep on his pillow. I just love the way it smells like him. I love my husband. He is awesomely perfect for me. When you hear the phrase “absence makes the heart grow fonder” the longer I am married the more I believe that this phrase actually means “short, infrequent absences make the heart grow fonder.” My husband and I are usually only apart for 2 weeks a year, one week in the spring and one in the fall when he goes to conferences for work. I am always reminded, not by him telling me, but just as I go through my days without him how much he does for our family and more specifically, me. Another phrase we all know, “If momma ain’t happy, ain’t nobody happy” and this phrase really encompasses family happiness. And I don’t mean that in the “cowed husband” kind of way, but mutual respect and love between husband and wife kind of way. If too much is on momma’s plate, if she doesn’t get enough love and respect, she is an unhappy person. And who does she affect? Only everyone.

I know we all know someone in a rocky marriage, or has been divorced, or going through a divorce or maybe you are that person. It breaks my heart to see this unhappiness. Especially in the home. Our homes should be a sanctuary for our families not a place we don’t want to go to. I think the hardest part of being married is to bring equalization to each spouse. It could be easy for my husband to tell me that I can’t spend “his” money since I stay home and he works, but he is very adamit that “his” money is our money. I work at home, he works at work. Because of his respectful attitude about our money it makes it easier for me to want to go out of my way to do things for him. Simple things that I know make his day better like having a lunch ready for him to take to work instead of him making his own or spending money on lunch out of our tight budget. He gives up most of his evenings so I can go walking with my friend. Thankfully we both go out of our ways to do things for each other. We have a big yard, very very big yard and so he can spend more time with our family on the weekend I try to mow the lawn during the week so he doesn’t have to spend all day Saturday having alone time with the mower. My brothers would fall out of their chairs that I mow our yard… if they actually read my blog they would. I mowed part of the front yard once as a teen and that was after all my brothers left home. Apparently I did a bad job because dad never asked me to do it again. ANYWAY, my husband knows that I don’t edge or anything like that, just mow and do the flowerbeds, so every other month or so he edges the yard and does the lawn all at once. He appreciates that I mow, even if the lines in the grass aren’t even close to being as straight as his.

Babbling on, okay, back to my point. I don’t have a perfect marriage, I am far from a perfect person and neither is my husband but I feel like we work very hard to not be selfish in our marriage. I feel like selfishness is 100% the reason people divorce. The unfortunate thing is that every person must make their own decisions and if a person decides to be selfish there isn’t much their spouse or anyone else can do about it. So I don’t want anyone thinking that they are stupid for having unhappiness in their marriage. I just wanted to say that I love my husband. He’s gone right now and it reminds me of all the awesome things he does for me and our family. I know when I focus less on my wants, and focus on my family I am a happier, better person.

Picture of us when we were dating:

Serious picture from when we were dating:

Engagement:

Wedding:

Us now:

He’s hot. I know.

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Responses

  1. You have such an adorable family! And I totally agree with you – it’s the little things, the small ways you say “I love you” and the giving of yourself that really makes a marriage work.

  2. Agree!
    And ya, your brothers probably won’t read your blog. Nate doesn’t even read mine. But they would be shocked that you mow the lawn. Good crap, if I have to hear one more time about how great Nate is at mowing the lawn, I’m going to freak out. And you do have a huge yard, so way to go!
    Great post, I LOVE the pictures!

  3. Just stumbled upon your blog and love this post! I come from a broken home and believe it is so important to have your spouse be your best friend. My husband and I are rarely ever apart either and we miss each other so much when we are. With all the craziness that babies and kids bring, going out of your way to create playful, bonding time is essential. Sounds like you have a wonderful family. 🙂


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